The gut punch I didn't see coming ...
As legend has it, Harry Houdini bragged that he could withstand any punch to the gut, as long as he had time to prepare himself. But a fan struck him without warning. It caused Harry considerable pain. And a few weeks later, he died from the injury.
I've been through a fair amount of stuff. And, like Harry, I'm pretty confident that I can take anything that's thrown at me - as long as I see it coming. And, like Harry, I found out that gut punches without warning hurt.
A couple of years ago, I was at a denominational camp meeting in Brown City, MI, serving as one of the child evangelists for 4th-6th graders. It's a place I have a fondness for. And not because of the camp itself. It had all of the charm and amenities that you might expect from a place called Brown City Campground. There was a lot of dirt. And heat & humidity. And smell from the cows across the street. And, well, a lot of brown.
I had previously been a part of the denomination, and had many friends and acquaintances who attended the camp. My kids did, too. At that time I was a children's pastor in Minnesota, so on top of the work I was called to do, I also got to experience the love and care of dear friends. My kids got to reconnect with friends they hadn't seen in a couple of years. Kind of a working vacation, in many ways.
That year, as a part of the youth program, my 13-year-old daughter took a spiritual gifts assessment. One of the SHAPE tools that many of us have used. And she came home pretty excited about it. Why? Because, in her words, "It seems like these gifts would be good for a pastor. Just like my dad."
This is the kind of stuff that dads dream of, right? My teenaged daughter kind of wants to be like me! And, her openness towards what God might be calling her to do for His Kingdom was exciting. We affirmed that God could call her to do anything. And I believe, like all 4 of my daughters and my son, that God has big plans in store for them, if they choose to follow His call.
But, as a little time passed, I also was struck with a little sorrow and frustration. I knew how hard the path would be ahead of her, if she did hear God's call to pastor. Because she's a she. There are still seminaries in America that would ban her from their preaching classes. And people who would say heartless and cruel things to her about her role in the church and in society - all in the name of Jesus.
I shared my excitement over the news she shared, and my frustration about the difficulty of the path potentially in front of her, on social media. Celebrating your kids. Advocating for them. Dad stuff.
As camp wrapped up, we said tearful good-byes and made the long drive back to Minnesota. I was excited to get back and dig into some things at my church. I had just finished my first year there - a year full of lots of change - but things were looking up.
I had met with my Kids' Church lead team a few days before leaving for camp, and it was the kind of team meeting that you can only dream of. Everyone showed up! My wife and I had made breakfast, and we had a great time catching up from the first couple of months of summer. They shared outrageously positive feedback about the changes from the previous year. They gave constructive suggestions for further changes. I bragged to everyone who would listen about how great this team was.
And then came the gut punch.
I returned to find out that a couple who was on that lead team had expressed concerns with me as the leader of children's ministry, and were pulling their kids out of children's ministry.
Didn't see that coming.
I told the interim senior pastor that I wanted to sit down and chat with them. This had to be some kind of mistake. Or miscommunication. Or something.
And I did sit down with them. They took issue with me saying that I would support my daughter becoming a pastor. We had a conversation about it. Nobody convinced the other that they were right or wrong. But it was constructive, and I felt we ended things in an open and respectful way.
Then came the next punch.
An hour later, I was copied on the email to the interim pastor and elder group, calling for my dismissal. Calling me a false teacher. A heretic.
Didn't see that coming, either.
And then came the boycott of Kids' Church by several prominent families, organized by an elder's small group. And the people leaving the church. And more calls for my dismissal.
The hits just keep on coming.
The elders felt compelled to create an official church policy on the roles of men & women. Anyone want to guess where they landed on that? I was offered to study the Bible with a couple of the elders so that I could see the error of my ways. I suggested that maybe I wasn't a great fit for them.
Ultimately, I gave notice that I intended to seek new employment, and they agreed to allow me to stay until I had secured that. And several months later, God guided me to a new adventure with a church in Maryland. And this last year has been oh so good.
---------------------
Brown City Camp just wrapped up a week or so ago, and I've seen all my friends posting happy memories on Facebook. I haven't seen many of them since I last taught at camp 2 years ago.
And, over the last week, I've found myself dealing with a whole lot of unexplained anxiety. It finally hit me. I've now been at this church for a year. Something in my brain thinks there must be a gut punch coming.
Because, you see, unexpected gut punches hurt. They cause scars. They bring death. They teach you to always be prepared, so that it doesn't happen again.
It's an easy choice to make. Lots and lots of people do. I do, sometimes. We put up wall and barriers and play it safe. We live a life with the Boy Scout motto - Be Prepared.
But that's not much of a way to go through life.
Because that's not the way God intends for us to go through it.
Romans 8 is one of my absolute favorite passages of Scripture. It's one I frequently share verses from when leading worship in Kids' Church, because I think we can't hear it often enough. I know I can't.
If God is for us, who can ever be against us? Who dares accuse us? Who will condemn us? - There might be some who try ... but ultimately, Paul's answer to each question is "No one ... no one ... no one".
Can anything ever separate us from Christ’s love? Does it mean he no longer loves us if we have trouble? No.
Overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us. Let those words sink in for a second. Overwhelming victory.
Nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Not fear. Not death. Not even the power of hell. Not anything.
So it's time to let the fear of the unseen gut punch go. To let anxiety go. To live like Jesus said He intends us to live - a life that is abundant, rich and satisfying. A life where I pursue relationships with God and people with everything I have.
Even if the gut punches come.
I've been through a fair amount of stuff. And, like Harry, I'm pretty confident that I can take anything that's thrown at me - as long as I see it coming. And, like Harry, I found out that gut punches without warning hurt.
A couple of years ago, I was at a denominational camp meeting in Brown City, MI, serving as one of the child evangelists for 4th-6th graders. It's a place I have a fondness for. And not because of the camp itself. It had all of the charm and amenities that you might expect from a place called Brown City Campground. There was a lot of dirt. And heat & humidity. And smell from the cows across the street. And, well, a lot of brown.
I had previously been a part of the denomination, and had many friends and acquaintances who attended the camp. My kids did, too. At that time I was a children's pastor in Minnesota, so on top of the work I was called to do, I also got to experience the love and care of dear friends. My kids got to reconnect with friends they hadn't seen in a couple of years. Kind of a working vacation, in many ways.
That year, as a part of the youth program, my 13-year-old daughter took a spiritual gifts assessment. One of the SHAPE tools that many of us have used. And she came home pretty excited about it. Why? Because, in her words, "It seems like these gifts would be good for a pastor. Just like my dad."
This is the kind of stuff that dads dream of, right? My teenaged daughter kind of wants to be like me! And, her openness towards what God might be calling her to do for His Kingdom was exciting. We affirmed that God could call her to do anything. And I believe, like all 4 of my daughters and my son, that God has big plans in store for them, if they choose to follow His call.
But, as a little time passed, I also was struck with a little sorrow and frustration. I knew how hard the path would be ahead of her, if she did hear God's call to pastor. Because she's a she. There are still seminaries in America that would ban her from their preaching classes. And people who would say heartless and cruel things to her about her role in the church and in society - all in the name of Jesus.
I shared my excitement over the news she shared, and my frustration about the difficulty of the path potentially in front of her, on social media. Celebrating your kids. Advocating for them. Dad stuff.
As camp wrapped up, we said tearful good-byes and made the long drive back to Minnesota. I was excited to get back and dig into some things at my church. I had just finished my first year there - a year full of lots of change - but things were looking up.
I had met with my Kids' Church lead team a few days before leaving for camp, and it was the kind of team meeting that you can only dream of. Everyone showed up! My wife and I had made breakfast, and we had a great time catching up from the first couple of months of summer. They shared outrageously positive feedback about the changes from the previous year. They gave constructive suggestions for further changes. I bragged to everyone who would listen about how great this team was.
And then came the gut punch.
I returned to find out that a couple who was on that lead team had expressed concerns with me as the leader of children's ministry, and were pulling their kids out of children's ministry.
Didn't see that coming.
I told the interim senior pastor that I wanted to sit down and chat with them. This had to be some kind of mistake. Or miscommunication. Or something.
And I did sit down with them. They took issue with me saying that I would support my daughter becoming a pastor. We had a conversation about it. Nobody convinced the other that they were right or wrong. But it was constructive, and I felt we ended things in an open and respectful way.
Then came the next punch.
An hour later, I was copied on the email to the interim pastor and elder group, calling for my dismissal. Calling me a false teacher. A heretic.
Didn't see that coming, either.
And then came the boycott of Kids' Church by several prominent families, organized by an elder's small group. And the people leaving the church. And more calls for my dismissal.
The hits just keep on coming.
The elders felt compelled to create an official church policy on the roles of men & women. Anyone want to guess where they landed on that? I was offered to study the Bible with a couple of the elders so that I could see the error of my ways. I suggested that maybe I wasn't a great fit for them.
Ultimately, I gave notice that I intended to seek new employment, and they agreed to allow me to stay until I had secured that. And several months later, God guided me to a new adventure with a church in Maryland. And this last year has been oh so good.
---------------------
Brown City Camp just wrapped up a week or so ago, and I've seen all my friends posting happy memories on Facebook. I haven't seen many of them since I last taught at camp 2 years ago.
And, over the last week, I've found myself dealing with a whole lot of unexplained anxiety. It finally hit me. I've now been at this church for a year. Something in my brain thinks there must be a gut punch coming.
Because, you see, unexpected gut punches hurt. They cause scars. They bring death. They teach you to always be prepared, so that it doesn't happen again.
It's an easy choice to make. Lots and lots of people do. I do, sometimes. We put up wall and barriers and play it safe. We live a life with the Boy Scout motto - Be Prepared.
But that's not much of a way to go through life.
Because that's not the way God intends for us to go through it.
Romans 8 is one of my absolute favorite passages of Scripture. It's one I frequently share verses from when leading worship in Kids' Church, because I think we can't hear it often enough. I know I can't.
If God is for us, who can ever be against us? Who dares accuse us? Who will condemn us? - There might be some who try ... but ultimately, Paul's answer to each question is "No one ... no one ... no one".
Can anything ever separate us from Christ’s love? Does it mean he no longer loves us if we have trouble? No.
Overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us. Let those words sink in for a second. Overwhelming victory.
Nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Not fear. Not death. Not even the power of hell. Not anything.
So it's time to let the fear of the unseen gut punch go. To let anxiety go. To live like Jesus said He intends us to live - a life that is abundant, rich and satisfying. A life where I pursue relationships with God and people with everything I have.
Even if the gut punches come.
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